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# Creating Who You Want to be
- URL: https://www.fsm.ink/creating-who-you-want-to-be/
- Published: 2022-08-15T22:44:31.000Z
- Updated: 2026-06-03T18:50:49.000Z
- Author: Melissa Gorzelanczyk
- Tags: Editorials, #Import 2026-08-03 09:59

by Melissa Gorzelanczyk

This spring, I was wandering trails behind my house at dusk, listening to an interview with writer and activist adrienne maree brown about boundaries and making a creative shift.

The podcast interview came at a time when I was struggling a bit. Maybe you can relate: Sometimes I want expansion, vitality, and goals, but I don’t necessarily have the capacity for them. However, I can listen.

So I ambled over new grass through cold spring air as adrienne spoke of the book *Atomic Habits* by James Clear. adrienne liked how Clear inspired her to ask these questions of habits:

> What kind of person do I want to be?  
> What are my habits to become that person?  
> Do I have community around those habits?

The idea of having habits and community around the kind of person I want to be intrigued me. And terrified me a whole lot. It’s true: the things I do every day make up my life. (Scary, right?)

In time, I reflected on my list of desires. It’s written on a yellow index card. I wrote the list after reading *The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success* by Deepak Chopra. Deepak suggests you write such a list, a list of things you desire, and carry it with you wherever you go.

One of my latest desires is to be a financially successful author. Now, inspired by adrienne’s three questions to take my list further, I sat with my favorite notebook, comfiest blanket, and red rooibos tea to ponder the kinds of habits a successful author might embrace. Then, I noted where community exists or could exist if I want.

Like this:

*What successful authors do*

> Write  
> Community: Sunday writing group, social media, email newsletter

> Read  
> Community: Libraries, bookstores, UntitledTown book club, subscribe to magazines and journals

> Work on craft  
> Community: My MFA cohort, writing workshops, writing conferences, writing organizations, tips from social media, specific friends whorecommend writing craft books

> Present work  
> Community: Writer friend goals/accountability, follow magazines and journals

And so on. I can use this list to help ensure the things I do in my days and weeks align with the kind of person I want to be, especially on those difficult days. I can use it to nurture my deepest desires.

What lists could you make? As adrienne said on the *Moonbeaming* podcast, once you decide to develop mastery, you set a pattern and then grow the pattern. You could start with one minute. You could start with one walk.